A week or so ago a young man won his case against his employer for not allowing him to wear his trousers half way down his bum. I find this so disheartening. Why shouldn’t an employer stipulate what is acceptable dress for the job? I am appalled that this young man’s human rights are more important than his employer who, let’s face it, is paying him to do a job for his company. Why bother wearing any trousers at all. It is NOT a human right to offend others.

I think that in a lot of cases this is an outward sign of not wanting to integrate, grow up and take responsibility for one’s own life. We all know that as we grow older that to a degree we have to compromise and conform. We cannot live harmoniously in a world where everyone can do as they please. We have to have ethics, codes of conduct and respect for others. If we do not then the whole system breaks down and we have anarchy.

I am not suggesting that this young man is in danger of causing chaos in our society but more that our judicial system no longer seems to reflect a mutual respect for individuals in our society. Apart from anything else, these kids are all walking like penguins and are storing up back problems for themselves in the future. Who knows it could cause a genetic mutation. What next – a mobile phone growing out of our ears?

Best wishes Dorothy Denny

Why is it so much easier to be negative than to be positive? One basic if not the only reason is that we as humans are lazy and it takes a lot more effort to be positive most of the time. These days are no exception with so much unemployment and government cuts and the uncertainty that this brings.

To change your thinking from negative to positive takes pro-active will power. Negative thinking can become a habit and a very detrimental one to both our brain’s thinking and body’s functioning. We often find ourselves subconsciously seeking out situations and people that reaffirm and reflect our own state of mind or state of affairs. Have you ever heard someone say or maybe you have said it yourself, “I can’t stand to be around so and so. He/she is always so jolly and cheerful.” There are two reasons for this. There are no grounds for mutual understanding and they make us feel guilty because quite frankly we are being selfish and self-indulgent.

If you are feeling negative and want to change then start with the little things. In the morning when you wake up be thankful for the new day and that you are alive. Actually that is no small thing. Then look for things that are positive – the first daffodil of the season. Look for something that you can do that is positive – let someone pull out in front of you in the traffic jam on the way to work. Ask someone how they are and really mean it AND listen to what they have to say. Can you say something that will cheer them up?
Negative thinking is a vortex that sucks in and the spiral is only downward. Whereas, positive thinking is reflective. The saying he/she is like a ray of sunshine is a great analogy of a positive attitude. Positive reflects outwards and is thinking of others or goals but negative mirrors inwards and is selfish, dare I say it, and really is only thinking of ourselves and our miserable plight.

So if you want to cheer yourself up make someone else happy or do something for someone else. Start today looking for the good and positive things around you. Before you know it having a positive attitude will become a habit which is good for the soul and body. The negative will become a thing of the past. It takes time so one step at a time. I challenge you to try this and you will be pleasantly surprised at the difference the little things can have on you and those around you.

Go on, give it a try.

All the best Dorothy Denny

Commonsense from commerce says “Youth unemployment will continue to be a tragic loss to our nation until we improve our education and preparation of young people for employment; too many are unemployable”

Let’s be honest we are all guilty. We need to make our young people employable by helping and teaching them communication skills, the importance of appearance, how to be employable, what they can contribute as against what they can be given, but above everything else to help them to have the right attitude.

Yes, I have a vested interest here. We have the complete programme, we have trialled it with phenomenal results. Can I get a decision maker in parliament to make a decision, NO. The flavour of the moment is let’s keep our young people in education longer teaching them stuff they will never use by people who have never worked outside education. Yes we know it’s very expensive, yes we know it doesn’t work but we don’t know what work life skills are because we are politicians.

So we continue with disappointment. We release 20% of our young people hoping that some benevolent employer will take on the responsibility, but if they don’t we’ve got to face up to the massive problem and unrest and problems in our City centres. In my own personal opinion as the public sector employment opportunities diminish, we are surely compounding this disappointing situation, and that could be so easily corrected.

Richard has just returned from a really successful lecture tour of Iran, his third. He was telling me about how one of the speakers was permanently “tweeting”. Richard came home very enthusiastic about this as a possible business tool. So I went on the web, as you do for most things, to find out more. I had of course, heard of the great success of Twitter. I was not convinced or impressed by what I found.

I find that the average person I know spends far too much time on the computer as it is. It isn’t good for our backs, or our eyes or our wrists and I am sure that they will discover other ways that spending hours in front of a screen is harmful to our health. But really this is beside the point. It is so very bad for relationships in the home and beyond.

Our time is pretty special to us. We have six sons between us with wives, girlfriends and grandchildren plus family in the States and there is also Richard’s three brothers. And what about our friends and other commitments? These all take large chunks of our precious time which we give joyfully.

So how much time do you spend Tweeting and Facebooking ? Facebook I will agree can be fun and is useful for friends but do I really want to spend loads of time taking on more friends just because they may have a loose connection with folks I know? As for Twitter, why do I want to wade through comments, most of which are banal in the extreme from people I do not know, most likely do not want to and will never ever meet when I have family and friends to whom I wish to stay in contact? Do I really want to be a voyeur to my friend’s tiff with her daughter over a dress she wore or comments made after a party where boys were boys? If you want to know what your kids are really like have a look at their Facebook page!!! Be warned!!! What about evenings in most homes these days where everyone retreats to their own private screen? No one in the home communicates verbally – they might tweet or put a message on their wall to someone in the next room – but we are in danger of losing our ability to communicate properly, verbally and in the flesh – face to face. We are becoming isolated in our own homes. We as grown-ups and parents should really take notice and take stock. First it was the television. Then came videos. Then came computer games and mobile phones, then came laptops. Now the laptops have Twitter and Facebook. The only thing we haven’t discovered that we can do on screen is eat real food and the effects thereof.

I am sure that this blog will stir a few of you up and that is the purpose. I need to create a dialogue on the virtues of something that is a bit like passing notes in class and having them intercepted.
Richard is on Twitter and Facebook which I have encouraged as it is important that we all stay abreast of the changing world. But not all changes in our world are ones that everyone should embrace. Will tweeting really make a difference to Richard’s business? I’m not convinced. Does it really make a difference to yours? Less of it might just make a huge difference to your work performance and to life in your home with your spouses and children.

Let me know what you think. My mind is still open but I have grave doubts.

Dorothy Denny

I’m not going to whine. I’m not going to ask AGAIN? I’m not going to ask why Capello brought on Heskey instead of Crouch. And I’m certainly not going to ask why the centre-backs apparently forgot what the job entails.

I am instead, going to reach for the positive message that came from the weekend’s football. Back in January Richard Denny wrote a blog about Barbara Ehrenreich’s book attacking the power of positive thinking. Basically Enrenreich says it doesn’t work.

Well Barbara, perhaps you should watch your fellow Americans play football. (World football, not American football!) On Saturday night during the US v Ghana build-up the ITV commentator mentioned that all teams that buy American footballers say their technical skills are only one of their benefits. They say US players are a bonus due to the relentless belief they will win. ‘Americans certainly believe in their capacity for coming from behind. They have proven it more than once.’

Sure the US got knocked out. But for a team that is not in the world’s top ten they did themselves proud. Positive thinking. US footballers are a good example of its power.

Maradona seems fairly positive, wouldn’t you say?

Kieran Bird

As I understand it, he’s not the only one.

A lack of facial hair has been a rule in business for many years. The reasons why are pretty solid. I remember as a child being told by a neighbour never to grow a moustache or a beard, as it indicates vanity. That was the mid 70s, and the neighbour was an elderly woman.

Since then studies have shown that some people associate facial hair (on a man, of course!) with vanity and eccentricity. Facial hair even makes some people think of dishonesty – as a beard can hide the mouth to some degree. So for me, that’s a good enough reason to be clean shaven.

But according to a recent article in the FT, beards are making a comeback amongst the upper echelons of business. Specifically, a few company owners and CEOs are sporting beards in London these days. Apparently they now see beards as a sign of social standing. That is, people like you and I might need to shave (unless you are female of course!), but the wealthy don’t need to.

A wee confession. I wore a goatee for a few years while promoting my PersonaPR book in the U.S. I decided it was worth it to look different, to cut through the clutter of competition from hundreds (if not thousands) of other professional speakers. Not really sure whether it was the right decision, but as I went back into corporate life I lost the beard.

So, can CEOs afford the luxury of looking eccentric? Richard Branson’s breaking of the rules of business deportment has never harmed him. When training executives in personal branding I always advise a conservative appearance for business. At this stage, I have no intention of changing my advice.

But are the rules changing? What do you think?

Kieran Bird

In the current economic climate where every sane business leader is striving to keep customers, to keep their brand visible and to attract new business in a declining market; there is one company that has joined Gordon Brown’s ministry of silly decisions…Norwich Union.

Norwich Union, a giant and a brand of 200 years. A great name reassuringly safe that appears to be conservative in this turbulent economic climate where there appears to be little safely in financial institutions. I can only presume that the decision to re-brand Norwich Union to Aviva must have been taken by a banker, accountant or lawyer (sorry to offend my friends in these professions). Maybe Norwich Union are going to diversify and don’t want to be identified with providing good value insurance products. Or perhaps they are going into construction, ship building or furniture retailing (great markets to lose money in right now).

Anyhow they probably spent a million or two in dreaming up the name Aviva and are now spending “trillions” (fashionable word) on their re-branding and advertising etc. This is money that could have been spent on winning new business and increasing shareholder value.

If you have a minute……how about some ideas to destroy other great brands with a new name.

Royal Mail – you can’t suggest Consignia as they tried that one Virgin Microsoft Scottish Widows Tesco Marks & Spencer McDonalds

Humiliation has become an intrinsic ingredient of so many reality TV shows. I personally find this obnoxious. What a sad departure from basic human core values of treating others as we would like to be treated.

Dare I say it again; East Enders was and still is the leader of the pack of negative TV (though not a reality show). The worst examples of taking the nastiest elements of human behaviour and communication to disgraceful excess are exemplified by East Enders. Now the last time I criticised East Enders in my book “Succeed for Yourself” the tabloids pilloried me. Even John Prescott, then deputy Prime Minister was motivated to make a ministerial announcement that East Enders was the epitome of all that was good in Britain today – sick. After that announcement the tabloids did an about turn and then claimed that probably I was right. Well it increased the sales of “Succeed for Yourself” but not much else.

The TV networks have a plethora of humiliating programmes to choose from. “The Weakest Link” – “The Apprentice” – “Big Brother” – “Come Dancing” – “Master Chef” – and of course Gordon Ramsey’s numerous exposures. But what a pleasant surprise when I switched on to Terry Wogan’s “Wogan’s Perfect Recall” to see the presenter being kind, generous and reassuring. A big man in all aspects with nothing to prove.

In business and at work bosses have no right to humiliate, to degrade or to disgrace. No boss should ever make people feel small, to crush them or to deflate their people’s self-esteem. I only hope that these demeaning programmes are not setting role models for aspiring supervisors and managers to imitate in this pathetic mindless celebrity led culture. If they do they will only enhance the employment tribunal industry.

My wife’s grandmother told Dorothy on a regular basis “you will attract a lot more flies with honey than you ever will with vinegar.” A great thought.

With 24 hours news reporting on TV and the intense competition of newspapers, journalists have to find copy to fill their editors’ insatiable appetite.

For all of us no news is good news. For the news media it is BIG trouble. So the news journalists are pressurised to find stories or items that will also satisfy the public’s insatiable appetite for the negative. As we all know the standards of newspapers are deteriorating and this is emphasised by the propensity of the overuse of the words catastrophe, disaster and calamity with all of the adjectives that can go with those words. It seems that the majority of the British public, (Brits…no offence caused, I hope) thrive on the negative. There is nothing like a disaster (9/11) to sell newspapers or get people tuning into the TV news.

Do we really want a recession, credit crunch etc. No of course not. But nevertheless there is a fascination with big companies going into bankruptcy or thousands of people losing their jobs.

Today’s journalists have learned the art of spin from some excellent teachers. It really is not too difficult to make no news into big news with a bit of a spin or the right inflection in the voice. May I suggest that you try just for one week to resist buying a newspaper. Switch off the radio news and don’t tune into the TV news…you will survive. Then buy The Week Magazine because the stale news will keep you informed but will hopefully preserve your sanity.